37-Year-Old Woman Says Friends Fear Her Timeline for a Baby with New Boyfriend Is Too Rushed

A woman is unsure if she’s moving too fast with the plans she’s made with her boyfriend of six months.

The 37-year-old woman had been friends with her 38-year-old boyfriend for four years before their relationship became romantic. She explained in a post on Mumsnet that they both have good jobs that allow them to be financially stable and hope to build a future together.

The woman revealed that they haven’t decided yet on if they want to get married. However, they plan to move in together next spring and start trying for a baby in late 2026.

“I was chatting with some girlfriends over the weekend about these plans, and they essentially told me that I’ve lost the plot and that 18 months in is far too soon to try for a baby,” she said. “For context, my mum and sister both had healthy babies at 40 on their first attempt, but of course, I know fertility is unpredictable and there are no guarantees for me.” 

“I feel our age compresses the timeline, especially if we end up wanting a second down the line,” the woman continued.

The OP [original poster] said her friends are going through personal issues in their lives that could be influencing their perspective on her situation.

“I’m trying to figure out if our timeline is actually rushed, or if my friends are just projecting their own pace,” she said, before asking, “What do Mumsnetters think? Is this timeline mental? Feel free to be honest!”

The majority of responses to the post attempted to reassure the woman that she should go ahead with her planned timeline for the relationship.

“Sounds fine to me and is pretty much what I did! As long as you’re both on the same page about the baby, I would crack on,” one person commented.

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“If you were 30, it would be too rushed,” another said. “As things are, not at all. In fact, I might consider shortening it a bit! It’s also very significant that you have known each other for 4 years, not just the 6 months you’ve been together.”

“If you had the luxury of time and youth, I’d say what’s the hurry?” a third chimed in. “I would suggest you even move in sooner, as that’s when you get deeper insight into your relationship. Not just him, but how you work as a team, negotiate, share, etc.”

“Honestly, at your ages, I would just go for it — if you can go the distance together, then you will,” someone else wrote. “Doing a year settling-in period won’t make any difference to how your relationship will change once the baby comes, you will make it or you won’t.”