Wedding Guests ‘Shocked’ as Bride and Groom Ask Them to Cover Venue Costs

A guest plans to “back out” of attending an upcoming wedding after the bride and groom requested payment for their venue and accommodations.

In a post on Reddit’s “Wedding Shaming” forum, one wedding guest shared that they initially agreed to attend their friend of 15 years’ wedding as a bridesmaid but changed their mind after being told the “totally ridiculous” terms. The individual was “shocked” to learn that the couple expect their guests to cover their venue costs.

The bride and groom, who will tie the knot next year, rented a large house as opposed to a more traditional venue. They requested that every family member plus every member of their wedding party stay at the home for “the whole week leading up to the wedding” and pay for their own stay.

“They are charging couples $1200 for the stay and single people $600, essentially making everyone pay for their venue,” the ex-bridesmaid wrote, adding, “The bride and groom tried to sell it to us as a ‘fun week-long vacation’ at a ‘discount’ with lots of ‘activities.’ ”

The woman believes an entire week is “a pretty ridiculous ask, considering everyone has obligations.” In addition to guests having to take time off of work, consequently losing a week worth of income, they’ll also have to pay for the trip to the destination wedding venue.

“They chose a venue that is seven hours away for the state most of us live in, and is a far flight from the rest of the bride and groom’s family,” the posted noted. “This place is not somewhere you can fly either, so everyone must drive or rent cars at the nearest airport which is upwards of two hours away.”

A few people spoke up about not wanting or being able to stay at the house for a whole week, which made the bride and groom feel “very offended.”

“As if it is an issue, and [they] fully expect to be making the money back for the wedding by doing this,” the poster noted.

The poster thinks this is a greedy move considering “the groom comes from a wealthy family” and had the financial means to “front the cost for everyone.”

“I find it to be very self-important and cheap of them. I’d much rather travel for a few days to a venue than have to pay for someone’s venue,” she said.

On top of everything, the woman is not allowed to bring a plus-one. Additionally, the bride got “super upset” at her and other bridesmaids when they said they could not afford the expense of her destination bachelorette party in Mexico. The bride was “mad” she had to “settle” for a local party — one “everyone is still paying for.”

Reddit users commented that the poster made the right decision to drop out of the wedding, calling the bride and groom “ridiculous and entitled.”

“Demanding everyone stay in their designated venue for a week is ridiculous, and expecting you to just hang out by yourself the whole time is inconsiderate,” the top comment reads. “What do they even expect everyone to do there for a whole week? I worry that this time would be spent doing mandatory set up and DIY for them too.”

Never miss a story — sign up for PEOPLE’s free daily newsletter to stay up-to-date on the best of what PEOPLE has to offer, from celebrity news to compelling human interest stories.

Another Redditor agreed, writing, “I would decline and step away from being a bridesmaid. This is frankly outrageous. A complete grift.”

In response to one comment, the wedding guest noted she was worried that she and the other people invited to the house would be “expected to take it all down the next morning” because “the rental ends the day after the wedding.”